Are you ready for that relationship?

Hallos 2All the single ladies.......:D
Got lots of stuff about relationship.. that must help!

 Firstly, Some of us that have been hurt before or came out of a relationship and you have not really taking out time to breathe,love yourself all over, heal or even just take a break to reevaluate and enjoy being single, we are so busy looking 4 boaz(ur hubby) that we hope and settle 4 Roaz, Coaz nd get our heart broken again, u need to cool off. U really need to detach from your past Or U unconsciously carry baggages around to your next relationship


 I wanna ask u a question u should pounder about, if u just came out of a relationship, heart broken before or hurt why do u want another relationship, are u ready, if your answer is just cos of companionship permit me to tell u, u aint ready. If its co u just lonely omo u can like to hug pillow o(av been there)

 Ask yourself are you really single or you have one bros somewhere u exchange emotional or "luvy duda" words, hmmmmmmm take caution.

 Take out time to heal, focus on your purpose, please cry if you have to, talk to a friend if you have to,
 I have acted home alone part 5000, so if any body has reason to b bored omo na me go top list no movie, nothing, so I study my bible, eat, sleep, watch movies o, pray, if am bored talk about it and sleep.

 How many of us know, and have written down our core value and know exactly what we want Cos we have our part to play ooo, most gals just go by am praying 4 my boaz but not doing their own part, we meet a guy and practically "throw all @ God's face and say am praying about it"

  You put compatibility before attraction o. You and whoever you wanna date must b compatible in areas of your Core values as in there should b an alignment. For example, in area of spirituality, imagine someone from MFM or DEEPER LIFE getting married to one chronic Christ embassy member that dont believe in demons or witches, omo except they r compatible na issue b that.

 Or core values as regards social life in d area of music, me I don't do circular music (based on my conviction) imagine I now hook up with a guy that wakes up playing "ur waist ur waist"  U might think this are trivial issues but trust me they are serious issues.

 Let me highlight certain key core value areas that u need to directly or indirectly ask questions about:
  Issue of Good character, security and trust. 2. Family background: do you accept where he is coming from, their family values etc cos in a way it forms who he is. 3. Social life: if you an outgoing person,that likes concerts, outing, red carpets etc you now marry somebody that dont believe in going out or hanging out, hmmmmmmm na issues. Pastor poju oyemade gave an example of you meet a guy and you are like he is gentle, doesn't talk much etc, when you marry you now start complaining that the guy rarely makes comment on things,you get angry that he has changed, no he dint change he is just manifesting who he is which you thought you changed or you overlooked.
  4. Your level of education/professionalism. are you a career person then you marry someone that doesn't believe his wife should pursue her career or do phd etc. 6. Level of ambition, how far do you want to go in your career, does this guy/babe believe in it??? 7. Spirituality 8. Sexuality: does he believe in no sex/chastity till we marry, what measures are you guys putting on ground to solve sexual pressure when it comes cos trust me it will come. 9. Financial values 10. His view of raising family 11. Mentorship: someone like me that believes in mentorship or spiritual father,mother n siblings I can't marry someone that doesn't believe in it
 Conclusively,In deciding who u will date/marry, use your heart and your head, call a spade a spade, surround yourself with people that can ask you serious questions before you cling.
  Note you cannot change a man
#WoRD
 You cannot, somethings dont change o, what u can't accommodate when you marry don't settle for it in the name of love...Lobatan!
  Seek not for  a man forming spiro and not sincere, it takes a man that fears and love God to love and respect u,Check out how a guy treats his mum, sis and female friends na so e go treat u o,If he is calling gals names, cutting calls on people or ignoring calls, :D ur turn go soon come.
  If a someone leaves a girl/guy for you chances are there that he/she would leave you for another girl/guy

Pls take note if u can

  If a guy is not noticing you make new hair, or compliment you now or make you feel like a princess that u r, omo chances r that 99% he won't wen u marry.
If he is using negative words on you, you don't trust him, e dey beat u... E don b niyen o. My pastor will say, why date a suspect na

 Ask questions ooo, even if he is boaz o, cos ehn when d butterflies in your belly leaves u,thats when you see reality o. Love isn't just about feelings its a decision to accept someone the way they are plus their imperfections and flaws.if you are not ready to accept them that way flee.
  Learn how to be a bestie, girlfriend, paddy, lover, mother to your man as need arises ooo. Cos most of us are just in "love mode" and when the guy wants to tell us some of the things he has done or happened to him we begin to act like a jealous and immature girlfriend
  there are times he just wants to talk to you like a friend.
 Make sure you work on sincerity and openness and create a very comfortable environment for your man to tell u anything and you dont get this by demanding Suit, you get this level of trust by earning it, showing you are matured enough. Not that the guy saying something about how he saw a girl today and he liked her or something happen and you go like:O what, ehn, me nko....
  No b like that o
  Lemme tell you what I have discovered
  Guys are moved by what they see o and they will continue to see and that means they will continue to be moved. So that means it takes a discipline man, a man that fears God and respects his wife not to act on what he is seeing cos truth is no matter how holy the guy is, he dey see o

 Nd women no dey help matters, dey leave everything open
  for these men to freely see
  So you had better have an avenue to talk respectfully about your man's sexual needs and all.
  If he isn't talking to you about it then its either he is practicalising it or telling somebody else or masturbating
  Make sure you are the one that hears all your hubby's escapades o

  U see why you really need to know if you are ready for a relationship, are you strong enough to handle the emotional pressure and still keep it holy cos its the woman that has the work of chastity in her relationship more cos the guy can forget. Its just 2 out of 15 men that keep strong in that area.

 The  issue of how he treats his mum or sis, true that, its a 60/40 thing but trust me a man that is not accountable to his mum, pastor or people or a man his mum can't say don't do or pastor especially, the guy can't b accountable to u
 A man that does not have a father can't go far
  Father as a spiritual authority or someone he is accountable or someone  u can report him to and he will fear and listen pls dnt date or marry such a person.
  Then don't b deceived o there is either a born again Christian or not,No in between,Your husband must be spiritually higher than you,you can't b d priest ova your home thats not the design ooo,U r to submit to your husband,that is to say your husband can hear God 4 u,U can't marry a man that is still taking milk co sum other Christians do it,Mbaaa o.
  If you are the one saying  wake up, let's pray, do this, be ready to do that the rest of your life. Am not saying that @times you meet the guy @ stage milk but you will see he is growing not just to impress you but cos he understands he is suppose to be the head and loves God
  When push comes to shove then you will appreciate that you married a matured Christian this doesn't mean He doesn't have issues just that he is embracing grace and dealing with his flesh daily

  The man you wanna marry must challenge you not to compete but to COMPLETE
  A true Christian is sincere, open and not hypocritical.

                                Talk by: Imisioluwa sulaimon (peehi) of His jewels group